Coptic Orthodox Diocese of the Southern United States
www.suscopts.org
   A  B  C  D  E  F  G  H  I  J  K  L  M  N  O  P  Q  R  S  T  U  V  W  X  Y  Z

I need advice with relationships. I am 25 years of age and I have been extremely anxious for the past few weeks. I am a servant and serve alongside with a female servant for many years. It is only recently that I noticed her from how gracious and kind she is to others. I am very attracted to her inner beauty and feel she would make an honorable wife and mother.

I finished my Masters Program one year ago and I am currently applying for work. She also just graduated from college and is looking for work. I want to approach her to see if.she has the same feelings towards me. I fear she might reject me because next to her, I feel like a bad person. Her inner beauty makes me feel inwardly ugly. I also feel that she might reject me because I do not have a job or a car yet.

I pray about this a lot, almost fighting with God and asking Him to make it clear to me whether I should ask her or not. I ask Him to take away my feelings if they are not from Him. Last night, I was praying to God to let me know if she is the one or not. In the morning, I opened my Holy Bible to continue reading the Book of Acts, but instead my hand opened the Holy Bible suddenly to Proverbs, and my eyes fell on this verse: "Her ways are ways of pleasantness, and all her paths are peace. She is a tree of life to those who take hold of her, And happy are all those who retain her" (Proverbs 3:17-18). One thing I know for certain is that my feelings have not one grain of lust. I also feel that if I wait too long I will lose her to someone else, and this thought causes me great pain. I am very suspicious of any guy that talks to her, even my own friends! I know this is not healthy, but I do not know how to stop this.

As in every task, first address it in prayer and ask God for His will to be done. Without a job in hand, it†is not appropriate to propose or to overtly state your interest, but you may begin by getting to know her better†with†the guidance of your confessor father. If she is responsive to your interest, then strive toward the next step by achieving employment. There is no reason for feeling extra anxious. This is a normal step toward marriage in our church. If she is not available or not interested, she will let you know in some way, and then you can both move on with your lives.

Home | Ask A Question | Search Q&A