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Our church female saints all have a common denominator of virtues. Meekness, humility, silence and submission are glamorized. A prime example is our Holy Virgin Mother, St. Mary. She is a model of our faith, venerated and exonerated; mainly due to all the holy virtues of silence, submission, humility, obedience and so on. But what can I do if I am not born good, and do not have all the qualities of St. Mary, Tamav Erene, Om Il Ghalaba. I absolutely love and adore these characteristics, but I find it is so difficult to attain. I fall short of being gentle, quiet and meek. As such I am constantly struggling with my identity, and my personality which the American culture would label a "leader". I am unable to reconcile my personality with that my father and others wish I had. I fear I will go to hell because I am not of this same gentle nature. My confusion does not at all affect my belief in God; but is mainly confined to personal and social confusion. Is there any place in the church and in heaven for women who are God loving and God fearing, but not like St. Mary?
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